Question:
My relationship and father are very close. Maybe, because I was the only daughter in the family. But without realizing it, I always choose lovers who figure and character similar to the father. Is that fair? Why can affect my father in choosing a mate?
krisxxx@yahoo.com.au
Answer:
In looking for a partner very closely with the child can figure their parents. If men generally look for mother figures, whereas women usually find a figure who like his father. Especially if the father figure of quality. There are two things that most make women 'fall in love' from his father figure, the personality and success factors.
Dad's career success, success will be judged in terms of material has a big responsibility. No wonder, a woman who grew up in affluent families often choose a partner ambitious or hard working, like his father.
But, you should be careful not to get stuck a father figure. If the similarity with the father's lover in things good and positive, you should be grateful. Because, it could also help develop positive relationships with the lover.
However, if you're looking for similarity was not as big as you expect, should not have to be too disappointed. Who knows it turns out you have to adopt either the admirable characteristics of the father as decisive, wise, strong, so the pair you need precisely the opposite, for you and your partner complement each other.
But, if the resemblance to his father's lover is in the negative things, then you alert. Basically difficult to change the characters that have been formed from the pair. But, if the relationship continues, then you will face the same atmosphere as you were a child.
Therefore, before moving to the level of marriage, see a psychologist to discuss the problems you face. If you already understand the evil pair and realize that you are difficult to change, now the choice is yours whether to continue the relationship with a number of consequences that have been realized, or choose to break.
Consultant:
Maria Susana
Psychologist
